Finding Her Purpose In Connection
By Michaela Feldmann
What is your purpose? Many of us ask ourselves that. Some of us know right away. But for others, figuring out what you want to do with the rest of your life can be a tough question.
“I’ve always envied people who just knew. It took me a little longer, but I finally feel like I’m right where I’m supposed to be.”
Ciarra Prather laughs as she sips her tea in Pierce Street Coffee Works. It doesn’t take long, though, to discover that the woman who describes herself as a “hot mess express” has something rare: the ability to make you feel seen.
“I have always loved connection and talking to people. So many times, we all feel a little lost or a little weird, and so many people try to hide that. I think we all have to embrace our ‘weird’ or the thing that makes us different. Connection does that. It brings us together, and we realize we aren’t so different after all.”
That gift of connection was built, Ciarra says, one uncomfortable moment at a time.
“You probably wouldn’t know it talking to
me now, but I was super introverted as a kid.
Unless I was with my people.”
Her dad, Tom, worked while her mom, Lori, stayed home to raise Ciarra and her older sister, NaTausha.
“My parents have always been two of my biggest cheerleaders,” Ciarra shares. “They’ve been that constant support in my life, always encouraging me, believing in me and reminding me that I can do hard things. My mom, especially, has always been someone I can turn to for anything. She’s one of my biggest sounding boards. I truly don’t think I’d be the woman, mom or leader I am today without the love and support of my parents.”
Growing up on Sioux City’s north side, Ciarra went to Hoover Middle School, where Perry Creek now sits. Here, in seventh grade, she met a boy who would have a lasting impact on her.
“Ryan, my now husband, instantly became my best friend. I actually liked his friend,” Ciarra laughs.
But by eighth grade, something started to shift.
“He had these gorgeous blue eyes, and they got me. Something just shifted.”
When Hoover Middle School closed, Ryan went to West, and she went to North. Ciarra got really into dance and cheerleading and worked at The Buckle. Here, she would meet someone else who helped shape her path, teaching her skills she would carry throughout her career.
“Niki Buss, my manager, I think, just saw something in me,” Ciarra says. “She really encouraged me to step out of my comfort zone, approach people and just become comfortable
with myself.”
Niki quickly became one of Ciarra’s biggest mentors.
“I owe a lot of my personality and who I am as a woman to Niki. She saw something in me that I didn’t see in myself yet. She gave me opportunities and pulled me out of my shell. Sometimes people just need someone to see them. It was life-altering.”
Those experiences helped her confidence grow. When Ciarra graduated high school, she went to Western Iowa Tech for a year before transferring to the University of South Dakota. Ryan went to Briar Cliff.
“There was this moment where we realized we wanted the best for each other and we wanted each other to find ourselves. So, we split up for a bit when I went to USD, but he stayed my best friend. We talked all the time.”
Ciarra studied mass communication with a minor in psychology. But before graduating, Ryan and Ciarra found their way back to each other, and he proposed.
“Ryan had graduated and was teaching, but I had a year left. So, we had a
two-year engagement so I could finish up school.”
They got married in 2010. “He is my best friend, and it’s been that way since sophomore year of high school. He’s the first person I want to tell everything to and the first person I ask for advice.”
After graduating, Ciarra says she had a tough decision.
“I had no idea what I wanted to do. I still felt lost, and that can feel really scary,” Ciarra admits. “I knew I had a passion for kids. I knew I loved connection. But nailing down a calling felt impossible.
I thought, ‘OK, I’m graduating now. I have student loans that are going to kick in soon, and I just need to find a job fast.’”
That job came through an internship from one of her best friends who was a co-host at a local radio station in Sioux City.
“I remember thinking, ‘I have a Minnie Mouse voice, and I do not want to be on air.’ My first day, I ended up on the morning show. I thought it was going to be terrible,” she says. “Turns out, it was so much fun.”
That internship turned into something more, though: a sales position at Powell Broadcasting that began a longstanding career in media that spanned years.
“I never pictured myself in sales and I questioned what I had gotten myself into,” she jokes. “They said, ‘Here is your book of business,’ which was just a phone book at the time. They said, ‘Just go out and see who needed marketing.’ As an introvert, I was terrified.”
Here she learned some of the most valuable lessons of her career.
“You have to roll with the punches. I learned how to communicate. How not to communicate. How to work with different people and think creatively.”
She also learned that a lot of times, people just want to tell you about their business, their passions and
their story.
“That’s where I really connected with my job,” Ciarra says. “I got to interact with so many people I normally wouldn’t get to, and the businesses are part of what makes this community so great.”
She also learned that nonprofits were some of her favorite clients.
“I loved being able to find ways to help them and connect with them. There was always something about their missions, about the way they helped the community that I really loved.”
But she still felt that desire for more. Ciarra says she tried wealth management but quickly knew it wasn’t right for her.
“I’m not meant to sit behind a desk all day. I love interaction. I need to talk to people.”
She returned to Powell as a regional sales director before moving on to KCAU for a digital role. But the pieces still weren’t fitting.
“I was at this point in my life where I loved what I was doing, but I kept telling my husband that it wasn’t filling my cup anymore. I felt like there was a bigger purpose.”
Three months later, the nonprofit world started to draw her back in. A post on Facebook caught her eye. Kristie, the executive director at Big Brothers Big Sisters of Siouxland, was moving to Omaha. Ciarra felt an instant pull.
“It was so different than anything I had done, but I loved the mission. At first, I gave myself all the reasons I shouldn’t even go for it. I was talking to my husband because he is literally my biggest cheerleader and sounding board. He asked such a simple question. He said, ‘Well, why not you?! What’s the worst thing they’re going to say? No?’”
That was enough. She trusted her faith and leaped, reaching out to Kristie and asking for a coffee. When she left that conversation, Ciarra says something shifted.
“For the first time in my career, I felt like I wanted this, and I knew I could do so much for Big Brothers Big Sisters. When I sat down for the interview, it was one of those things, this sense of knowing you are exactly where you are supposed to be.”
Nearly a year and a half into the role, Ciarra is right where she’s always meant to be.
“I’ve learned that I don’t have to have it all figured out or fit into someone’s idea of what a leader should look like,” she explains. “I’m bubbly and quirky, I ask a lot of questions, and I don’t have it all figured out. But I’m learning alongside
my team.”
And the mission is one she is deeply passionate about.
“The kids in our program are coming from all walks of life, and you can make such a difference in their lives simply by showing up. To be able to have someone who wants to see you succeed, who wants to make sure you are seen and that you feel like you matter — it’s life-changing.”
It’s the kind of mom she hopes to be for her three kids, Beckett, Payton and Tate.
“Being a mom is one of my greatest joys,” Ciarra says with the biggest smile on her face. “Ryan and I joke that our family is a bit of a circus, but it’s a circus we dreamed about together and our parents help keep the wheels on the track. We love the little humans that they are. I hope they look back and remember that I was present, that I loved them BIG and that I showed them that kindness always wins.”
She also hopes they know that just like their mom, they don’t have to have everything figured out.
“Put yourself out there. Be a friend. Take the chance even when it feels vulnerable or scary. That’s where you grow the most. Even if you feel silly, just embrace your quirkiness, your weird. Some of the most beautiful connections and opportunities come when you do. Life is about being open and just riding with it. Just have faith that everything will work out and listen to that little voice guiding you.”
When she looks at the big picture, she smiles.
The Buckle taught her to be open, approach people and find common ground.
Powell taught her to form relationships in the community.
Her journey is her own, one where she didn’t have to have everything figured out, but one that brought her to her purpose.
“It’s cool when you can step back and look at it all. I am a big believer in timing,” Ciarra explains. “I feel, for the first time, that I can say what I’m doing is something I am so incredibly passionate about. I spent years asking myself what I wanted to be. Turns out, it was always about connection.”
More with Ciarra
Ciarra teaches yoga on Fridays. She says it’s the only time she can truly shut off her mind, be present, slow down and connect with herself.
Born in Salt Lake City, Utah, Ciarra was raised in Sioux City, where she has built deep roots in the community she now calls home. She and Ryan attend Trinity Lutheran Church, and while faith has always been an important part of her life, she believes it’s less about a label and more about having a personal relationship with God.
One of her biggest pieces of advice is that you can’t be everywhere and do everything. If you try, you will almost always fail at everything.
Dance has remained a big part of her life and a creative outlet since high school. She used to coach at North High and Middle School, as well as 5678 Dance Studio. Ciarra says it’s one of those things she loved to do, but she loves being with her kids even more.
Above all, Ciarra says spending time with her people will always fill her cup the most.